Reflections from the Halfway Point

To Emily of August 2014,

It's me, your older, wiser, and better looking self from the future. I've made it to the halfway point of our YAGM year. I know I must seem a million miles away from you--and in some ways, I am--but I'm closer around the corner than you think. Time will seem to creep along glacially and time will seem to vanish, in that cruel way that time waxes and wanes. From the summit of my year, before I take the descending journey through to the end of July, I want to leave you with some advice.

• Orientation will be the best week in the history of the world. You won't realize it until it's over, so savor it now.
• When you get to Rwanda, try not to be so overwhelmed. You're here for a year, I promise all of this strangeness will soon feel normal.
• Study harder in Kinyarwanda lessons. I know your brain is tired, but you'll thank yourself.
• Your doctor was an idiot, so make sure you take your malaria medication with food. You will save yourself a lot of pain...literally.
• When you get to your placement you're going to be stressed and overwhelmed and homesick. Cry it out and then pull yourself together. You're in this for the long haul.
• You're going to want to buy some boots sooner. Trust me on this one.
• This too will pass: I remember October being difficult. I also can't remember a single thing about October. This is your life, so just live through it, the ups and the downs.
• November will bring all of the YAGM friendship. You can make it. It's worth it.
• Really? It's December...you should be studying more Kinyarwanda than you are.
• Wear more sunscreen in Burundi. Yes, more. Even more than that.
• Your mood will greatly improve when you institute daily dance parties into your schedule. I recommend you begin this habit sooner.
• Basin baths are a lot more fun when you do them in your room. Instead of being wary of spiders getting into your water, you can watch Grey's Anatomy while you wash your hair. It's a win-win.
• Ralph is a rat who lives in your room. You will try to kill him multiple times and he will not die. While you write this blog post, he will leap over your bed and run out of your room. He is probably an animagus.
• You can't even begin to understand how good the pineapple is. Get ready.
• The staff at Peace Guest House will become your best friends. Start going their earlier, they make delicious sandwiches.
• Things will feel normal. Things will feel good. You will be happy, you will laugh. You will also miss people and miss places, miss foods and beers, unlimited internet and snapchat. You will find joy in the small moments, feel the tangible beauty of a sunset over Lake Kivu, and realize play crosses language barriers. Things are different. It isn't always better, but it isn't always worse. It just is. You will be a lot happier when you realize this.

Best of luck as you start your year. Don't stress out so much about packing, and hug all of your friends one more time. A year is a long time, but love finds connections in the most unexpected ways. You will have adventures you can't imagine. It's a beautiful world, welcome to it.

All my love,

Emily of February 2015

My 5 Favorite Misconceptions about Americans

The world knows a lot about America. It makes sense, the USA is one of the most influentual countries in the world, and it is something I've noticed in my travels to various corners of this planet. We can talk about how this is Western Privilege and a product of various forms of imperialism--and these are important conversations, don't get me wrong--but I think it's also important to note that the rest of the world doesn't know everything about America. My host family has never heard of Thanksgiving or Halloween and don't know every detail of American politics. In fact, some of the things I've heard from Rwandans about America have been humorlessly untrue. So, in light of an introspective post about the global reach of American culture and influence, here are 5 of my favorite misconceptions about Americans from various Rwandans I've met this year.

1. Marriage Contracts
In explaining my family to people, I mention that my brother is married. More than one Rwandan has countered with "And how long will your brother and his wife be married for?" Um, for life? What? It turns out that many Rwandans think that American couples sit down together and sign a contract before getting married--for one year, or five, or fifteen, etc. So you marry this person for a set amount of years and after, you're set loose back onto the world. I have no idea where this idea came from, but it is hilarious to me.

2. Pet Problems
I have a picture of my dogs as the background of my phone and my host sister loves to look through my collection of puppy pictures. But many of my friends in Rwanda think having pets is extremely strange. A few people have expressed that they hear Americans have a problem with friendship so they adopt pets. It is very strange for a communal culture like Rwanda to understand living alone. I've tried to explain that you can live alone and still have a lot of friends, but as soon as pets come into the conversation the argument is made that Americans clearly don't talk to other humans if they choose to spend their time with animals.

3. I Wanna Walk Like You
This one is rooted in some truth--Americans drive everywhere. We definitely drive too much and most Americans know how to drive a car. However, this means that many Rwandans see a white person and think they don't know how to walk anywhere. My first month in Cyangugu, my host dad didn't think I was able to walk more than half a kilometer. Explaining that I actually enjoy walking, and sometimes do it for fun, was a completely foreign concept for him. I've been told that many Rwandans are surprised when they see white people walking anywhere!

4. Smelling What I'm Stepping In?
Rwanda, and especially Cyangugu, is a muddy place. The rainy season pounds the dirt roads with heavy storms that causes mud--mud which I'm pretty sure is actually trying to be cement. My shoes are always covered in dirt or dust of some kind. Rwandan culture drives people to clean their shoes anytime they are dirty. My culture, and laziness, drives me to think "well, if it's going to just get dirty again tomorrow, why bother?" I have been told that Rwandans see white people walking around with dirty or dusty shoes and think we are "somehow fake" or "misfits." I try to explain that in America, if your shoes are dusty it's not a big deal but this is a new idea for many Rwandans.

5. Just Like the Movies
There's this recent trend in American movies--especially Marval Superhero fims--to show technology that doens't exist yet. Think Iron Man's computers--see through glass and 3D screens. Many Rwandans are exposed to American culture through media and movies, so they are very disappointed to learn that this technology doesn't exist. Trust me, I am too.


Part of the fun of my yagm year is getting to share American culture with my community. Even the things they think are strange or different! Part of living in community with people is sharing with each other, and as much as I am teaching my family they are teaching me. This is the beauty of traveling--to learn from each other and share with each other across the globe. Even if my brothers think it would be strange to chose my dogs over 100 cows.